Movie-buffs will agree that there are some important life lessons that can be learnt from movies. But before we get into that, what is a friend-date?
Simply put, a friend-date is an outing with a friend (who could be the same gender as you, or not). It could be going out for a movie, having a drink in a bar or simply hanging out at home watching Netflix. You may probably already be familiar with this term, and like me may be an advocate of friend-dates.
While we all love date nights, we need our friend-date nights. We need time with our buddies – nights out where we don’t have to suck in our stomachs or worry about our make-up (the second point probably being more relevant for our women readers). The best part about friend-dates is the comfort factor.
However, there’s a first time for everything. The first friend-date with a new potential friend can be as nerve-racking as a regular date. If it goes well, you may have a friend for life (not to add to the pressure). And that’s where I turn to the movies for guidance.
Here are six important lessons I have learnt from movies on how to have a successful first friend-date:
1. Split the expenses
Image via Paramount Pictures
“Friends and money… oil and water.” — Godfather III
Money can be one of the biggest reasons for misunderstandings or resentment between friends. It’s also one of the ugliest. So let’s get it out of the way in the beginning itself. It’s okay to treat your friend or let your friend pay the bill if it’s an occasion (like a birthday). Otherwise, it’s best to share the cost.
2. Listen, don’t just talk
“Oh, you’re the best friends anybody ever had. And it’s funny, but I feel as if I’d known you all the time, but I couldn’t have, could I?” — Wizard of Oz
Often when we meet new people that we want to befriend, we are impatient to talk and share our stories. In our eagerness we end up not asking them any questions about their lives, or worse not even listening to them. The important thing is to have a meaningful and equal conversation. And if we are lucky we may find our kindred spirits.
3. Be yourself
Image via Giphy
“You’re mad. Bonkers. Off your head…..But I’ll tell you a secret…..some of the best people are.” — Alice in Wonderland
In the first meeting it is natural to try to impress the other person. That is not a bad thing in itself. It’s okay to be the best versions of ourselves, as long as we are not pretending to be someone we are not. And for all you know, we may find a friend whose craziness matches ours.
4. Don’t lie
Image via DreamWorks Animation
“Only a true friend would be that truly honest.” — Shrek”
We all know that trust is one of the fundamental pillars of any relationship. Trust is built over time, and it starts from the first time we talk to a new person. We rely on our friends to speak the truth even if it is harsh, because we trust that they will do it for our own good. Be gentle, though. Honesty should not hurt the other person.
To misquote Uncle Ben from the Spiderman movie – with great friendship comes great responsibility.
5. Make a second date
“Louis, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.” — Casablanca
The best thing about a friend-date is that there is no agenda or expectation, and thus absolutely no need to play any of the typical dating ego games. If you had fun and felt a connection, don’t hesitate to let the other person know. Do remember, though, there is a thin line between friendly and creepy.
6. Don’t forget to have fun
Image via Disneyclips.com
“We didn’t even realise we were making memories. We just knew we were having fun.” — Winnie The Pooh
Last but not the least, don’t get stressed out about all the dos and don’ts. The important thing is to enjoy yourself. Remember, you may be on a friend-date with a person who might be your future BFF. You want to be able to look back at these moments fondly.
So, go on and make some new friends. Have a friend-date. Maybe, you can watch a movie with your new buddy. And if you learn any new fun or interesting lessons, do share with me in the comments section.
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